


i love you more than being seventeen

by friendplease



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, idk if it counts as self harm but just in case
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-29 11:55:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6373753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/friendplease/pseuds/friendplease
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>someone keeps leaving little gifts and notes for tyler and he wants to know who it is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i love you more than being seventeen

**Author's Note:**

> okay i usually write songs and stuff and this is my first kind of story in a long time so?? be gentle
> 
> (also this doesn't paint tyler's family in the best light but that's nothing personal this is all fiction)
> 
> it's cheesy and cliche but. that's good sometimes right??
> 
> please comment/leave kudos if u enjoy!!
> 
> title from evening sun by the strokes

honestly, tyler probably would have just stayed at his desk and stayed in his own head until someone physically dragged him away if it wasn't for josh's hand nudging gently at his shoulder. he pulls himself from his daydream and turns to look at his best friend, who is watching him with gentle eyes and upturned lips. his hand is still resting on tyler's shoulder.

"you okay, man?" josh murmurs, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"huh?" tyler replies eloquently, receiving only a raised eyebrow in return. "yeah, i'm good. just zoned out, i guess."

"you look tired. did you sleep last night?" josh asks as he hands tyler's backpack to him before getting his own.

"thanks, man." tyler gives him a quick smile before sighing and rubbing a hand over his face. "yeah, didn't really get a lot of sleep. my mom was on my case all night. apparently i'm slacking in basketball and coach called her yesterday. i got an earful."

josh gives him a sympathetic smile before slinging an arm around the boy's shoulder and leading him out into the hallway, and tyler pointedly ignores the slight fluttering in his tummy.

"that sucks, dude, but you're great at basketball. what's going on?"

"i don't know. just got a lot on my mind, i guess," tyler mumbles, before shrugging his friend's arm off and refusing to feel guilty about the confusion on josh's face as he did so. "listen, i've gotta go find maddy, but i'll talk to you later, okay?"

"yeah, sure," josh replies, but tyler was already lost in the sea of students trying to find their friends for break. he sighs and pushes thoughts of the other boy to the back of his mind, deciding he would just go and find somewhere he could sit in peace before having to return to class.

*  
it's been a couple of days since they had spoken properly when tyler rushes into spanish that morning, panting and apologising profusely to their unamused teacher. josh notices that he looks like he hasn't shaved in a few days, and his shirt is creased and wrinkled. he keeps his eyes on his friend as tyler drops down into his seat next to josh, absently trying to flatten his shirt and fix his messy hair.

"dude, what's up?" josh whispers, leaning across to get closer to tyler and keeping an eye on the teacher so as not to get caught talking. 

"nothing's up, just had a late night, is all," the other mumbles, tapping his pencil on his desk and keeping his eyes looking down and away from josh.

josh turns to look at him, furrowing his eyebrows. "everything okay with your parents?"

"my mom's raising it to 600 baskets," tyler sighs. "do you know how fucking hard it is to make 600 baskets a night, josh? i'm not cut out for this. i don't even enjoy it any more, it takes up all my time and then i either don't have any time to do my homework or i don't have time to sleep. i can't quit, though. mom'll lose it."

josh makes a face, but treads lightly when talking about tyler's family so as not to upset him. "did she do that with anyone else?"

"nope," tyler smirks, finally looking at josh. "jay's a fucking pro so she's not worried about him, zack still gets 500 and you know what my dad's like when it comes to maddy. he always makes my mom cut her some slack."

"well, why don't they cut you some slack?"

"look, it's not that important," tyler mumbles, turning his attention away from josh again. "nothing's gonna change so let's just drop it, okay?"

josh frowns but does as tyler wishes, choosing to focus on his work for once in an effort to distract himself from the other boy.

*

when tyler gets to his locker the next day, there's a torn piece of pink paper and a stick of his favourite gum lying with his textbooks. narrowing his eyes, he pockets the gum and unfolds the slip of paper.

_you never go unappreciated._

he catches himself grinning for a second before sighing and coming to the conclusion that it was probably someone playing some sort of prank on him.

(he still keeps the note.)

*

it's lunch on a tuesday, and mark and jenna are too busy throwing fries at each other to realise that tyler hasn't said a word since he sat down. josh watches him as he picks at his salad, unable to take his eyes off the torn skin of the other boy's knuckles.

"tyler," josh begins carefully, keeping his voice gentle and quiet. "what happened to your knuckles?"

"hmm?" tyler hums, not really paying attention. "oh, yeah. i kind of scratched up my hand without really realising it? i do that when i get stressed sometimes, it's not a big deal."

tyler eventually looks up from his lunch when josh doesn't respond, and shakes his head at josh's concerned look. "j, don't worry about it. i'm okay. school's just stressing me out, you know how it is." he smiles halfheartedly at his friend, before rolling his eyes and pulling a silly face when josh's frown doesn't disappear. finally, josh cracks a smile, the one where his tongue pokes out slightly from between his teeth, and tyler can't help but grin wider in return when he realises that _he_ made josh smile like that.

he's definitely counting that as a victory.

*  
tyler's fighting back tears as he stares down at the page in front of him, willing the formulas to just fucking _make sense to him already_.

nothing changes.

he shoves himself out of his chair with a growl, making the desk bang against the wall. he blocks out the faint sound of his mother's voice from downstairs asking what all the noise is about as he pushes everything off of his desk and violently kicks his open backpack across the room, before tugging at his hair and slumping down onto the floor. 

he breathes deeply, trying to calm himself down. just as his heart begins to slow again, he notices a little bit of green paper out of the corner of his eye. he wipes roughly at his eyes before leaning across the floor to grab the note that had spilled from his bag.

_you are the most incredible person i've ever known._

he doesn't know the handwriting, but it's the same as the last note and he gently traces a thumb over the words before getting up to place it on his desk along with his fallen textbooks.

he manages to get the exercise done.

*

josh is having lunch with the josephs on a peaceful sunday afternoon after attending mass. he and tyler sit quietly and pick at their sandwiches as tyler's parents and siblings talk about the sermon.

"it was a good one today," mrs joseph nods. "touched on some important topics."

"i'm glad to see them finally talking about homosexuality," mr joseph agrees, still chewing his burger. "too many kids nowadays are being led astray. there's too many people encouraging this stuff, it's unbelievable."

josh, having been raised in an accepting and loving christian home, doesn't bother to take the man's words to heart. tyler, however, doesn't appear to feel the same. he can feel his friend tense up beside him, staring down at his plate and gripping the edges of his chair so tight that his knuckles are starting to turn white.

thankfully, it's only a few minutes before they're allowed to excuse themselves, and josh follows worriedly as tyler races up the stairs to his room, leaving the door open for josh as he sinks down onto the bed.

"i'm sorry about them," tyler apologises shakily, and josh shushes him as he gingerly takes a seat beside him. they've discussed josh's sexuality before. josh had come out to his friends when he was 14, and although some hadn't taken it as well as he'd hoped, tyler had given him a crushing hug and whispered in his ear how proud he was.

"i don't care, ty," josh said, wishing his best friend would stop looking so ashamed. "i know you don't feel that way, and that's what matters to me."

tyler nods at his words, but he still looks devastated, and josh knows he has to be sensitive towards him right now. "tyler... is there a reason their words affected you so much?"

tyler doesn't cry, but he does let out a heartbreaking whimper, and josh whispers _oh tyler_ as he pulls the shaking boy into him, wrapping his arms around him like a shield.

"i'm sorry i didn't tell you," tyler hiccups, clinging to josh's shirt. "i didn't even want to admit it to myself."

"it's okay," josh whispers softly, running a soothing hand up and down tyler's back. "it's gonna be okay. i've got you."

they end up lying down on the bed, on top of the sheets, innocently holding onto each other. a couple of hours have passed, and josh has to go home soon, still has to do his homework and practise his drums, but he doesn't want to tear himself away. tyler had dozed off about an hour ago, and his eyelids flutter while he mumbles incoherently as he dreams. josh doesn't want to wake him up, doesn't want to pull him from his safe place. after another five minutes of debating in his mind what he should do, he runs a smooth hand over tyler's cheek and smiles as the boy's eyes open slowly.

"hey," josh whispers quietly, not wanting to ruin the tranquility. "i've got to go."

"okay," tyler croaks, smiling at his friend timidly. "thank you for... you know."

"don't mention it," josh shakes his head, grinning as he pulls his shoes on. "i'm always here for you. i'll text you later, okay?"

tyler nods, and josh gives him a smile and a thumbs up before softly shutting the door behind him.

tyler still stays in bed for another hour after the boy is gone before he even thinks about his baskets. his sheets smell like josh.

*

"tyler!" jenna calls from behind him in maths. "there's something in your hood."

tyler turns around to face her, narrowing his eyes. "what is it?"

"get it out and you'll see," she smirks. josh is sitting next to her, seemingly engrossed in his work and paying no attention to their conversation. tyler just shakes his head and plucks the item from his hood before turning back around and placing it on his desk.

it's a fucking heart shaped lollipop.

"jenna!" he hisses, keeping his voice low. "what is this for?"

"it wasn't me," jenna laughs, holding up her hands in surrender.

"well, who else would it be?"

"how should i know?" the girl shrugs. "just take the stupid lollie and get back to your work."

she stops paying attention to him, instead pointedly focusing on the exercise in front of her. tyler shakes his head and turns back to his own work, turning the sweet around in his hands.

it's cute. he'll admit that.

*

the gifts and encouragements keep pouring in, and tyler really wants to know who's behind it. this is the fourth day in a row he's received a note in his locker, and yesterday he'd found a teddy bear with a tag saying _for tyler xo_ lying in front of it.

it makes him smile, he has to admit. it lessens the weight of his mother's words when he reads the loving messages.

_you fill me with joy._

_everything you do is remarkable._

_you deserve the world._

_one day you're gonna be so happy to be alive._

he just can't believe someone would go to this much effort for him, and he can't even thank them. all he can do is keep everything he's given in a safe place, and hope that soon the person behind it will reveal themselves.

*

it comes on a friday.

he hadn't made 600 baskets last night, couldn't even manage 400, and his parents had yelled and his siblings had laughed and now his english teacher is telling him he isn't trying hard enough and he just can't do it.

the tears spill before he can stop them, and he's sobbing loudly as his teacher apologises and tries to get him to calm down and everyone is staring and josh looks horrified and he can't fucking do this. he's running out of the class before he even thinks about it, completely ignoring the calls from his teacher and josh's distinct voice. he sprints through the empty halls until he gets to the bathroom, gasping for breath as he collapses down to the cold tile floor, not caring how dirty it is. he brings his knees up to his chest and covers his ears as he lays his head down. he just wants to drown everything out.

he doesn't move a muscle when he feels a presence beside him, not until he hears the weak "tyler?" and realises that josh is here.

"what's wrong?" josh asks, shuffling closer. "hey, look at me."

reluctantly, tyler lifts his head, his bloodshot eyes meeting josh's concerned ones. he sniffles quietly, hiccuping slightly as he shakes his head. "it's too much, josh."

"what's too much?" josh whispers, resting his hand on top of tyler's.

"everything," tyler sighs, using his free hand to wipe his eyes. "school, basketball, my parents... i'm never fucking good enough."

josh shakes his head vigorously. "don't say that, tyler. you're always good enough. i don't care what your parents say or what a fucking teacher says."

"i just feel like i always let everyone down," tyler confesses shakily. 

josh grips tightly onto tyler's hand, using his other to cup the boy's face. "you never let me down." he takes a deep breath and looks into tyler's eyes before he continues. "i wouldn't have given you all that stuff, otherwise."

"what stuff?" tyler questions, furrowing his eyebrows. josh just huffs a laugh and swipes his thumb over tyler's cheeks.

"all the notes and the presents, dummy," he grins, although his voice is trembling and this moment feels like it's going to make or break him.

tyler just stares at him in disbelief. "that was you?"

"you really didn't know?" josh laughs, shaking his head. "i didn't think i was that good at hiding it."

"but... why?" tyler finally breathes. he can't understand why josh would go to all that effort, why he was so secretive about it.

"tyler," he sighs, grinning at how oblivious his best friend could be. "i've had a crush on you for years and, i don't know, i guess i thought you'd know it was me and you'd confront me about it. i was too scared to just come out and say it, but it's now or never, i guess."

they sit in silence for what feels like hours, the tension heavy between them. tyler just stares at josh with a shocked expression, making no move to respond to josh's confession.

"tyler?" josh whispers, before biting his lip and shaking his head. "fuck. i knew i shouldn't have said anything. i'm so sorry, man. if this makes things too weird i totally get it, its oka-"

he's cut off when tyler surges forward to kiss him, cupping his face and sighing against his lips. josh immediately kisses back, his hands moving to tyler's hair as their mouths work together.

"shit," tyler breathes when he pulls away, eyes glued to josh's lips. "wow."

"i know," josh agrees, staring at tyler for a few seconds before laughing and ducking his head into the crook of tyler's neck.

"what? what's so funny?" tyler questions, looking at the boy tucked against him in confusion.

"i can't believe our first kiss was in the fucking school toilets," josh grins, shaking his head against the other boy. "that's so gross."

"oh, shut up," tyler laughs, pushing josh off of him before heaving himself up. 

"come on," he beckons, holding a hand out to josh. "it's lunch now anyway, let's just go back to yours. that might be a slightly more romantic setting."

"deal."


End file.
